C is for Cookie

I hate to be cliche but since I am a stay at home mom for now I have to conquer my fear of baking. My favorite memories as a little girl were baking with my mom and finger painting. We probably did not bake and finger paint everyday but it kind of feels like we did. My mother barely made things from scratch which I never knew or cared about. Our store bought cookie dough, cake mix, and brownie mix were always perfect and delicious and I would never have known  better if it weren't for Aunt Rose. Aunt Rose the baker. OMG the woman could own a bakery. She travels to towns all over NJ for the best cookies and pasteries and cakes when she doesn't make them herself. As a kid I'd spend a lot of time baking with her. Christmas time, we'd make a shit load of cookies. When I say a shit load I mean she gives them to EVERYONE as gifts from her house cleaner, to the girls at the hair salon, to her neighbors, and every family household gets a box. Her motto is always how much work goes into one cookie. And I don't really like a lot of work, but I really love homemade cookies and decorating. Easter time, we baked the traditional breads and I remember literally tucking them into a bed; a trick to make them rise perfectly. So why oh why do I NEVER EVER bake anything that is edible!?!? E V E R!?! Well, I was on a healthy muffin baking kick last year and when they started getting good I invested in muffin tins that weren't the 35 cent disposable ones. Well, every muffin freaking burnt on the bottom or sides on every batch that I made. After googling that I need to put the tins on a cookie sheet to do something with the heat on the bottom and sides they didn't burn, but they were always dry, I had scorched and scratched expensive muffin tins, and I lost interest real quick. I read blogs and these #supermoms have great recipes, clever ideas, and funny stories about their kids. AND THEY ALWAYS ARE BAKING!!!!!! Most have big kitchens in big houses God knows where and every tool for the trade. I'm a great cook and wait till I start drinking again and blogging that's when things will really get good. Two babies under 2, a lush, and a blog? GREAT IDEA. But, in the meantime I am a very pregnant New York mom in a small space and damn it if you all are going to make my mouth water everytime I read a blog!! It's time to bake bitches!!

Obsessing and diving into projects is more of a distraction to the fact that in 3 months I'll have another little boy to snuggle with. There's no preparing for him either, we have EVERYTHING left over from Alex so we're ready for him. It's very different this time. And I am so hormonal and indecisive. I can't decide on his name, what the plan for Alex is when I am in the hospital, thinking about breastfeeding and what to do if Alex wants my boobs or what Alex will be doing when the new baby has my boobs, and all the big things that come with having a baby. Shit even the small things. I can't deal. Or decide. I have returned and reordered and returned and really pissed off Zappos. I have changed my mind three times ordering takeout from the Italian place. Twice I canceled on my Dad picking us up for vacation. I'm loving being pregnant for the second time besides being so crazy Mary. I feel great besides starting to feel really really big and more hormonal this week than like ever. But whatever. I am making cookies. And when you make cookies you smile and forget about sweating the small stuff because everything just works out. Somehow it does.

My tools to start with the basics: COOKIES!!!

Yesterday, I took my 20% off coupon to Bed Bath AND Beyond and bought myself cookie sheets with good reviews, a cookie scoop, parchment paper, a cooling rack, a rolling pin, fun cookie cutters, and other little gadgets that totaled my bill way above $100. And I went home. I am baking myself a batch of chocolate chip cookies!

They're out of the oven! 

Batch 1: FAILURE 

My cookies were gross. I even put them back in the oven to see if they'd cook or turn brown or something but they were gewy inside and the gew was seeping through the bottom. The batter got sticky and I should've put it in the freezer but I wasn't delaying my mission. So this is what I got. They don't look as nasty as they were. 

Batch 2: YUMMMMMMMMY!!!!!

Second round was woop-woop pretty damn good. Alex LOVED them and he is picky about his cookies like his mommy! They could've used more choco chips, but I couldn't help myself and ate a bunch and then another bunch before they made it into the bowl. OOps. I froze the batter for 20 min and what do you know they came out like cookies. Real cookie tasting cookies. And I would like to pass this recipe on to all of the baker's out there.

The smile of SUCCESS!!!

The very best chocolate chip cookies 

• 2 sticks softened butter 
• 1 cup white sugar
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 2 eggs
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 2 teaspoons HOT water
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 2 cups chocolate chips or chunks
• 1 cup chopped walnuts (I LOVE nuts in choco chip cookies but my son's allergic)

Preheat oven to 350

Cream together butter, white + brown sugar until smooth

beat in eggs one at a time

add vanilla

disolve baking soda INTO  hot water then add to batter 

add salt

add flour bit by bit 

throw in choco chips + nuts

drop by large spoonfuls onto pans w parchment paper

bake 10 minutes or until edges are browned